First day.....

So it finally hit me today.... HOLY CRAP I AM A GRADUATE STUDENT!!! I say that with pure excitement and a bit of nervousness. I'm just walking in the door from my first day and thought I'd do a rambling post here for you all of that experience. So let the verbal diarrhea begin....

I went to school this morning nervous, not because I don't know anybody (my extroverted self is luring some people in, plus it helps that I'm the weird Canadian and everyone has to tell me where they've visited and who they know.....so cute that they think BC is close to me), nervous because one of my profs sent out a 23 page syllabus. Are you kidding me???? HOWEVER today was awesome!

I'm teary right now typing this because my soul has been touched in a way by God that it never has been before. My first class this morning was Counselling Theories. We basically went through the history of counselling and how it came to be (did you know that the reason why counselling sessions are always an hour is because that's how long it took Freud to walk around a park with his first client so from then on it's just become the norm....told you this was going to be a rambling mess). Anyways, the prof I had this morning is also my advisor. I went to EMU fully prepared to hold in my passion to work with people who have Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID). I am VERY cautious, especially in Christian circles, who I talk to about thisbecuase of past experiences I have had. Guess what? She talked about her first time counselling a woman and said "she dissociated right in front of me". I thought I was going to cry. THEN she mentioned DID at another point. Kids I have a huge, huge, HUGE passion for DID. I have been blessed beyond by people who have let me into that part of their world. I just can't explain my love for it and my passion to bring normalcy to this fascinating and REAL thing, that right there tells me it's Him.

So then we had a library orientation and headed to our next class of Professional Identity, Function and Ethics. Sounds boring right? That's what I thought. SO NOT in my world. Man I'm a geek aren't I? I am pumped to learn all the right and wrongs and establish my style and what that looks like. I mean I feel as though I already have some sense of that. However there's always more to learn and change and I'm sure that will happen throughout this course. So in this class we had to go around the room and say out loud where we imagine ourselves to possibly be once we are licensed. Because of the first class I felt complete freedom to say what was on my heart and it felt SOOOOOOO good! When it came to me my heart was beating so fast in the way that I know if I don't say what God is telling me to that it might blow up. All eyes were on me and I said "I want to work with victims of sexual abuse and particularly those with dissociative identity disorder". I never thought that I would be able to utter those words until much later in my studies, but to be able to do it on the first day has got me so pumped (in case you can't tell).

I'm really doing this. I'm really going to become a counsellor. Sure it's going to be hard and sucky at times, it already has been. However at the end of the day it's this post that I need to go back and read. It's this very moment that reminds me that He has a plan for me and it's working out so wonderfully! He has kept His promise to me. I've worked really hard these past 7 years at working on loads of issues and helping others with theirs. All the while He was shaping me and molding me into this. And it is that that brings these tears that are streaming down my face right now. It is that that makes all of those horrible moments sitting across from my counsellor and telling her things that I never wanted anyone to know SO WORTH IT! It is that that will keep me going throughout this process. Thank you Father for touching my soul and keeping your promise!