Break time....

Here we are..... we made it through the semester and decided to have a comfy PJ day on the last day. I have learned so much from each one of these individuals. We are all so different, but as a group it works. I'm thankful for the semester, classmates, profs, and all that I've learned.

Now it's time to be home and enjoy all the goodness that comes from that. I really need a break, my brain is fried! I'll be back and blogging around Jan. 12, 2010 (wow 2010). Merry Christmas everyone!

Too cute....

I stumbled upon this during one of my many procrastination adventures.... I'm going to try this with Trooper, although he's not that little anymore :( Baby we need another puppy! The next one will be easy with all the crap Troop put us through...ha ha ha

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lHAshi4vdbg

and this one is the next trick my dog will learn...so cool!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qk1pOUb8a_g

**stupid embedding wouldn't work :)

Week 16....

• also known as the last week of the first semester!!!!
• I'm now officially 1/4 counselor :)
• learned that I don't speak English, I just use the English letters
• have a new friend who is a second year student, he likes to scare Erica and I with the realities of grad school
• was called "witty" this week, that's a first
• ate at Chili's for their 2 for $20 deal....you get one appetizer, two entrees, and one dessert for $20....we need a Chili's in Moncton people
• got all my school work done and handed in on time
• made a batch of my crack fudge as Scott likes to call it, brown sugar fudge just tastes like Christmas to me....could be all those years of stirring it and selling it for Mari Lynn
• am thankful for all the support I'm getting from all of you and my pals here
• had a moment where I was proud of myself.....I'm learning!
• Jason now has a code word for when my phone is being ridiculous....I now hear "skidoo" when the MagicJack is acting up
• end of year potluck at school tomorrow, I love potlucks
• PARTY Thursday night....wonder how many intoxicated individuals will be cramming into the Honda that night
• looking forward to coming home
• trying to squeeze out the little bit of food that I have left here so I don't have to get groceries before I come home, makes for interesting meals
• Trooper got a Christmas haircut and so did his Papa
• I'm in need of some Asian Garden...supper Sunday anyone???
• one step closer to practicum and Gestalt therapy.....look out world!
• I'm excited for Christmas!!!! I think the reality will sink in more when I finally get home
• although this has been a HARD experience at times...I'm so THANKFUL for it. Where would I be without that crazy Yutzky girl, my cooking/baking bud April, or those Cali boys? I'm going to miss these guys while I'm in the GREAT north :), much like I miss all of you when I'm down here. I'm pretty much never going to be happy anywhere now...Jason we need to live in the US for 6 months and then Canada for the other 6....what do you think?

Prayer please....

1. supposed to be a storm on Saturday in Moncton, I don't want to get stranded in Newark because my plane can't land...pray snow hits another province instead :)


2. have a huge heavy feeling that is a constant in my gut, please pray next 2 sessions with Nate (my counselor) alleviate some of that so I don't need to think about this crap while I'm home


3. have a situation that I have no idea how to handle with a close friend, pray for wisdom


4. my grandmother isn't doing so hot...she has pancreatic cancer, possibly cancer of the liver, and is now full of blood clots. She has been on so much blood thinners that her blood is too thin and she is now at risk of bleeding to death. Basically there is a lot going on and she has now decided to refuse all treatments and remain at home. This is going to be a rough Christmas for all of us. For the last 28 years of my life Christmas was huge with my grandmother. She would start baking a month before in order to have everyone's favorites made for the holidays. This year she doesn't even want to put up a tree because she can't get out of bed. She wasn't looking too bad when I was there a month ago, but I'm being told to prepare myself for the next time I see her. I don't even know what to tell you to pray for here, peace for her and my grandfather is of high importance.

Thankful.....

I love this picture of us, and not only do I love this picture but I LOVE the guy in it. Friends I'm going through some brutal shit in counseling right now. I have never been struck at my core like I have been in these past few months (seriously this is going to end at some point right?). So this poor guy is getting a weepy wife on the other end of the phone at least weekly right now, but probably more so soon. What does he say/do in those moments? All the right things! I'm so blessed....I can't even begin to explain the depth of my soul that has been touched by this man. He's the exception I have to every rule and expectation I have ever set for others in my life. He far surpasses what I could have ever hoped for. This process is sucky being so far away, yet at the same time it's a blessing to us as well. Relying only on communication is teaching us so much and strengthening that part of our marriage in an amazing way. In the last 24 hours I have heard two of my friends say really cool things about Jason and they have never even met him. "Your marriage gives me hope" one said. WOW, what a gift! And to that I say.....it gives me hope as well!

8 more days baby, 8 more days!

Another one gone....

I got another thing crossed off my school list today.....my group did our lobotomy presentation. Guess who cried during it? Yup, that freaking video gets me every time....it just brings me back to the moment. Really though I was going for bonus marks with the passion behind the project :)

Only 3 things left....theories paper, psychopathology review, and the ethics competition. Freaking ethics competition....when this rolls around again will someone please remind me how I feel right now so I don't apply to be on the team again? Thank you! It has been a hard process.. but a good one, even if we don't win. Anyways, that sucker is due on Sunday so I have a lot of team meetings this weekend. I can get it done in a week right? :)

Merry Christmas Mommy.....

....said the email in my inbox. I opened it and here was what was inside.....

The end is in sight....

Is it really true? Could it possible be? I'm going to complete this semester sane and more in love with that husband of mine than I even have been? I believe it is!

I did my final review for my Professional Identity, Function, and Ethics (PIFE) class yesterday. So I'm ALL DONE with PIFE!!!! I know it's just one class but it's such a wonderful feeling.

As for the others, one of my classes continues into next semester and I've already completed all the work for this semester. Counseling Techniques, I have one 5 page paper left, which I'm hoping to complete today. Counseling theories, I've got one 10 page paper left, which will get done on the weekend. And lastly Psychopathology, I have a group presentation on Thursday (which is all ready to go, I had an awesome group thankfully) and a take home exam that will be due (we don't have it yet) next Thursday.

So to recap all of that. I only have 3 more assignments left in this semester and I'm done classes a week from Thursday!!!!!! This was all made really clear to me when I got my bill for next semester in my mailbox yesterday. Sheesh grad school is expensive!

AND I'll be home for Christmas (that song has a meaning for me now and I get teary every time I hear it one the radio) in 11 days!!!!

LIFE IS GOOD FRIENDS, it really really is! Lets just hope I can remember this during my next two intense counseling sessions ha ha ha.

Pics from Thanksgiving break....

My sister just sent me some pics that she took the first night I got home for the big surprise.... Jason we need to practice taking pictures together because we aren't looking so hot :)

Not too long after I surprised the guy

good old glow bowling

Matt (Lindsay's boyfriend) strutting his stuff

Every once and awhile there is a picture of Lindsay and I that makes me see what everyone means when they say "holy you two look alike" and this is one of them....it's probably because we were both busting out the lines to "Whoop There It Is"....think we look alike?

one of us is a little more hardcore than the other :)

whatever we do, all roads always lead back to Mandi and Greg's for good times and FOOD! Yay surprises, friends, and birthday celebrations!

Play time....

As I said in my last post Trooper is LOVING the snow. Jason says he keeps wanting to go out to do nothing but dig in it.

...which results in this
the novelty of this is going to wear off and my puppy is going to get shaved again because snowballs in hair is sooooo annoying for both Papa and Troop!

Thanks for the pictures honey!

Week 14....

• got about 15 centimeters of snow....how fun and beautiful
• my LA buddies were worried they were going to get snowed in, but at the same time excited since they had never been in something like this before...so weird to me
• "so a snow blower is that like a leaf blower" ha ha ha
• I'm loving Jimmy John's subs....man I'm going to miss these places when I move back home
• it's full out Christmas here now, it's like it exploded after Thanksgiving
• I love Target as well
• did well on my presentation that I was so stressed about, thank you public speaking prof :)
• told Jason I got another 100% on something to which he responded "okay how about you start only telling me your marks when you don't do so well"...that's not going to happen because I'm awesome!
• only 2 weeks of classes left...crazy
• ethics competition essay is due a week from today so we're a busy team trying to get prepared for that
• looking forward to Christmas...we're actually being forced to scale back this year, this is going to be hard
• I feel everything in my body wanting to bake...weird huh? but so true....I don't get home until the 19th though so I'm not sure how much baking I'll have time for :( Maybe they'll be some after Christmas baking in our world....gotta make Jason's favorites and Scott's drug of choice
• didn't bring any Christmas CD's here with me, I love driving and singing Christmas songs .... hmm after this post maybe it's a good thing I got a haircut that makes me look older because I'm sure sounding like an old lady here
• I enjoy my classes and classmates, I'm looking forward to a break but also to getting started again next semester
• wondering when the next time I go to Disney would be, yes I'm obsessed
• Trooper had his first snow experience last night and loved it
• I've realized that I never want to live anywhere where it doesn't snow...although it's cold and pisses me off at times I freaking love it! I always get the same fun/excited feeling when there's a snowstorm and I never want to loose that!

It's beginning to look a lot like.....

SNOW!!!!! Check this out:

WINTER STORM WARNING IN EFFECT FROM 5 AM TO 7 PM EST SATURDAY... THE NATIONAL WEATHER SERVICE IN STERLING VIRGINIA HAS ISSUED A WINTER STORM WARNING FOR SNOW...WHICH IS IN EFFECT FROM 5 AM TO 7 PM EST SATURDAY. SNOW IS EXPECTED TO BEGIN ACROSS THE CENTRAL AND NORTHERN SHENANDOAH VALLEY JUST BEFORE SUNRISE SATURDAY MORNING. SNOW WILL BECOME MODERATE TO HEAVY DURING THE LATE MORNING AND AFTERNOON HOURS WHICH MAY REDUCE VISIBILITIES TO ONE QUARTER MILE OR LESS. SNOW WILL TAPER OFF EARLY IN THE EVENING. SNOWFALL TOTALS OF 4 TO 6 INCHES ARE EXPECTED FOR AREAS ALONG AND WEST OF THE BLUE RIDGE. TEMPERATURES ARE EXPECTED TO FALL INTO THE LOWER 30S DURING THE AFTERNOON HOURS. THIS WILL LEAD TO SLIPPERY ROADS. A WINTER STORM WARNING MEANS SIGNIFICANT AMOUNTS OF SNOW ARE EXPECTED OR OCCURRING.

So I'm going to bed and should wake up to a beautiful wonderland outside. How awesome is it that all of my American friends are getting snowed on before my home friends do??? That's Canada getting back at them for making fun of it so much!!!

Anyone else laugh that they actually explained in the last line what a winter storm warning was??? Too funny. The woman I lived with said the most she's seen here in the past few years was a couple of inches. How exciting!!!!!

I'm staying in tomorrow to write a paper and do laundry, seems like a perfect day for that if you ask me. I can only imagine how much people must freak out in this weather down here. Plus my LA buddy has to be at work for 4 and I don't want to be on the road when he is....eek :)

Seriously.....

Conversation between my "friend" and I from this morning..(you'll understand why I have friend in quotation marks by the time you get to the end of this)

Friend: "I like your haircut."
Me: "Thanks."
Friend: "Makes you look older."
Me: "Oh dear I don't know if that's a good thing."
Friend: "Oh right I suppose at your age you wouldn't like that, but for me at my age it's a compliment."

Seriously? Am I THAT old? Well "friend" I want to point out that I am STILL in my twenties unlike someone else in my household. AND although I may be getting older, I'm still hot so that's all that matters :) Man this must be how Scott feels!

Update....

Point form seems to be working for my brain so.....

• got home 7 hours later than I was supposed to yesterday...my plane was delayed getting to Moncton so I missed my flight in Montreal.... THEN because of weather the later flight that I got bumped to was postponed another 1.5 hours.
• thankful I could call my husband complaining and teary and that he felt the same way about the nasty Air Canada workers that I did
• also SUPER thankful for Christian....first plan was to pick me up at 4:00, then 8:00, then 9:00, then 10:30....good thing his girlfriend lives in DC and he was happy to hang out with her...what a great friend I have
• note to self do not plan a meeting at 8:30 am for an intense group project when you fly the day before just in case
• note to self #2 do not schedule another intense meeting right after your 2 hour 8:30 meeting when you fly the day before
• needless to say I needed a freaking nap when I got home from school this afternoon....I don't function well on 5 hours of sleep
• thankful one of my roommate's made lemon pound cake and is willing to share
• only 3 of each class left and then the semester is done
• have a 20 minute presentation to do tomorrow that I'm a little stressed about...I have to do it three times because of this rotating group system that she has....hopefully by the third time I'll have it mastered :)
• bought good old Canadian icy squares at the Bulk Barn on the way to the airport for my presentation...I enjoy bringing them back Canadian goodies
• texted Trevor while in Montreal airport asking him to pick me up a half gallon of skim milk so I could have breakfast in the morning because I knew I had cereal in the cupboard... come to find out it's not called skim milk so both he and Christian had to figure out what I meant...from now on it's "nonfat milk" ha ha ha seriously it's like I speak another language
• my dad may be buying one massive, awesome house in Florida....looking forward to staying at that sucker (hint hint) ha ha ha
• thankful to be back and get back into the school work that causes me some anxiety at times...missing home though.....there's just something about being in my house with my stuff and my family that brings a calmness to the soul
• looking forward to hanging out with my Harrisonburg buddies this weekend....there's even talk of partying it up in DC when classes are done before I come home....this is exciting!
• speaking of home...missing it and thankful I'll be back in 18 days...sheesh I'm getting spoiled this semester with the amounts of time I've been home...next semester is going to be a reality check since I don't have as much time off
• k I need to stop procrastinating and prepare for my presentation for tomorrow

Good to be home.....

• as I type this my puppy in my lap
• I'm cooking an actual meal and won't need to eat all of the leftovers myself
• I'm doing Jason's laundry (although I complain about this I do miss it)
• I'm able to help Jason with some stuff around the house, there's a lot to do when you're a home owner....especially when you're running a zoo in your house (or at last that's what it feels like at times with 3 animals running around)
• Troop and I did errands yesterday and both went to the doc....we're both fine and on the mend thankfully
• what a difference I'm noticing in that little guy, Papa has taught him lots of great things
• getting some school work done today.....I hate typing on laptops
• got to go to my church
• getting to see and connect with lots of friends
• healed an important relationship....such a breath of fresh air
• have some more fun things planned
• thinking I need to squeeze in some baking some time this week, the guys at Jason's work are putting in requests
• thankful for 10 days home but it still doesn't seem like long enough
• got to watch House with Jason last night instead of talking about it after we both watch it separately
• missing Ten Thousand Villages, especially during this time of year
• it's weird to me that Christmas is coming...I don't feel it yet
• still dialing 1-506 instead of direct numbers when I want to call someone local
• with all these thoughts and thankful moments I still have a piece of me in Harrisonburg... I miss those buddies of mine.....I think if they were good friends they'd move to Canada :)

Canada adventures....

So I'm home!!!! I came home to surprise Jason for his birthday. It was perfect, he had no idea. Mandi picked me up at the airport and we went to the restaurant for his birthday party. Poor guys was trembling when I hugged him, so cute.

Anyways some thoughts on my travels back to Canada:
-getting up at 3:00 am to catch a 8:51 am flight is still freaking insane to me....why do people live in big cities? in fact, why did I used to want to live in a big city?
-lots of people love me and were offering to drive me to the airport, I feel blessed...Christian was the lucky winner.....he wasn't so chatty when I got there at 4:00 am to pick him up
-there was actually traffic this early in the morning in DC??? again why do people do this?
-I threw a yogurt in my purse before I left my house and forgot about it....had to get my bags checked because of this stupid yogurt, which had to get thrown out....gotta watch out for those explosive yogurt containers
-I'm really liking Dunkin Donuts coffee....way better than Tim Horton's ....although not so fair trade....what are you going to do in an airport though
-when I finally got on the plane to head to Montreal I was sitting in the second last row, there was no one beside me but there were 2 guys across from me....the stewardess asked us to move to the front of the plane because "for this aircraft we need as much weight as possible in the front to offset things"......hmmmm here are my thoughts on that: 1. am I that fat? ha ha ha 2. I don't think I want to fly on a plane where a few hundreds pounds could screw up the whole flight... sheesh
-only restaurant in the crappy terminal I ended up in Montreal was horrible....got a roast beef sandwich and a bottle of water for 13 dollars....what a deal!
-decided to try to get some sleep on the benches since I had a two hour wait.... that was an experience....if it wasn't the announcements that woke me up just as I dozed off it was the creep man eyes that I could feel starring at me....seriously?
-it was so great to see Mandi at the airport....my body was bursting with joy as I walked towards her car...I held it together fine until she hugged me and wouldn't let go when I tried to pull away... freaking brat
-all in all I'm happy to be home and it was worth all the craziness to get here

I will be taking a blogging break while I'm here.....look for something new the middle of next week or so. I'm going to be a busy girl. There's only 4 weeks of this semester left. Where did the time go? Hope everyone is doing well and I hope to get to see you all while I'm home. I've got one happy husband, puppy, and kitty here let me tell you....

Week 12....

1. now married to a 30 year old, sounds hot and sexy ;)
2. been having trouble sleeping
3. went to a "Tasteful Treasures" party (basically a fancy way of saying a sex party) and learned a lot of things....eek
4. finished my last midterm....oh ya!
5. got invited to a prof's house for Thanksgiving supper (she's also Christian's aunt)
6. missed home a lot
7. haven't spent much time alone
8. went to a poetry reading because my friends hate me ha ha ha....seriously I am so not that type of thinker...I left confused, but the hot chocolate was good
9. embarrassed my husband, I love him
10. wanted to see my puppy, especially after being at a fellow classmate's house who had 4 shih tzus (one looked a lot like Troop)
11. went to the voted #1 burger joint in the states, it's called "Five Guys" and I have to say it was yummy....baby you need to get down here
12. heard from the backseat of my car from a Californian who is holding a snowbrush "what is this thing" ha ha ha is that not crazy? I informed him that he better buy one for his fancy BMW, or at least an ice scraper
13. got another A on 3 papers
14. had a rough 2 hour counseling session
15. Trevor cleaned his bathroom (this was a huge blessing, trust me)
16. am needing a break from school and a hug from that man of mine

Happy birthday....

Guess who is the big 30 today???

Happy birthday my love! I'm sad that I'm not there to celebrate with you, but it sounds like you're in for a lot of fun on Friday. Besides I'm sure Trooper has something up his paw as well. ha ha ha

It's hard to believe that when I met you we were celebrating your 23 birthday. I look forward to the many, many more years of celebrating your birthdays. I'm definitely not going to miss out on 40, especially since it's only 10 years away :)

Oh and for those of you that don't know, I won. When we first met, and for the longest time, Jason said that if he didn't have kids by 30 he wasn't having any. I said that if we had kids before then great, if not we still would. And he would get mad and say "Erin I'm retiring to do nothing but golf at 55 and I don't want any kids at home at that point". Guess who still wants kids :) Booya!

Processing.....

Have you ever peeled apart a rose? Each petal makes you think you're getting closer and closer to the center. Although you're excited to get to the middle to discover what's there, there is a sense of guilt and loss with each petal you rip off and toss aside. Therefore it's a bittersweet experience. On the one hand, there's the exciting anticipation of what's to come. On the other, there's something to be felt, a sense of mourning almost, for the layers being stripped away and taken from their duty to protect the hidden beauty within. Then there's always the question, what if the anticipated excitement isn't so exciting after all and you're disappointed when you reach the center?

Week 11....

• it was a short week, we only had 2 classes because this week is the Virginia Counseling Association's Conference.....so some profs and half of our class went there....I'm too cheap and didn't really want to go....now when the ACA conference comes I'm going and so is Erica right? ha ha ha...it's in Pittsburg in March
• I had some much needed chick time last night, we watched the movie "The Ugly Truth", it was so funny
• on the way to get the movie I went through a red light despite Erica saying "red light" three times....she was too calm so I wasn't listening
• didn't get any papers back this week so no marks update
• submitted my research paper, it felt good to hand that sucker in I spent way too much time on it
• it's been yucky here the last few days weather wise, however I shouldn't be complaining to all of you about that :)
• I'm missing coffee shop hang out time with the gang...we're all too busy writing and that's hard to do there so we've been working on our own a lot :(
• the counseling department had an open house this week for students who may be interested in the program, so I went to answer questions and explain why I chose the program....it was fun, I'm such an extrovert....when people found out I was form Canada it really sold the program that I came all the down here for EMU
• off to counseling today....poor Nate is probably wondering what he got himself into with me...ha ha ha
• I really want to plan something fun for spring break even though we can't afford it, basically we know where all roads lead in the Constable world PLUS Christian's girlfriend has never been sooooooo :) ha ha ha
• you can tell I'm in the middle of way too much work because I don't really have a lot of fun or exciting things happening....I think we're all needing some room to breathe....come on Christmas!

As per request....

This is a picture of my whole family (minus Jason and I, and my cousin who is in BC) on my dad's side from my grandparents wedding anniversary party. It was really hard for me to see this without me in it...BUT Lindsay wants it on here so I'll rub salt in that wound again just for her :) ha ha ha

Also, apparently I don't post pics of Jason where he can be seen just standing there with his mouth closed. Jason actually joked tonight that if there was ever an emergency that he had to come down here for, and Erica picked him up, that he would recognize her but she wouldn't recognize him. He said that he'd have to stand there and pretend he's sleeping in order for her to recognize him. Seriously why do I surround myself with these people? So I've dug through some pics and here you go Erica. I don't really have a lot of current ones of us. Perhaps Mandi does though??

this is SUCH a Jason face...see here's what I'm realizing he isn't a big fan of getting his pic taken so this is what I end up with....don't believe me? Here's another beauty....

so we'll go with the wedding pic......even though it's from 5 years ago....so just picture him now looking like this but more wrinkles and white hair (oh wait that last part would be me not him)

Happy 60th....

This is my Grammie and Pampie (this picture was taken a couple of years ago), and today is their 60th wedding anniversary. Isn't that nuts? That is so long and so wonderful. I only hope that Jason and I get to experience a life full of love with each other for that long.


This picture was from this past weekend at their anniversary party. It sucked that I had to miss it; I'm thankful my dad sent me pictures though. Grammie is really sick, so this was an important night for everyone!

Few things....

It's really rainy here, apparently we've got a tropical storm coming through. However it's just reminding me of cold, wet, windy days at home :)

I got to go shopping with the LA dudes tonight. Christian didn't have a coat. So we picked him out a lovely Columbia winter jacket. It's the first one he's ever owned at 26. That's insane to me! Anyways, it only cost $34.99. Isn't that crazy? I've found a new store that I will be stopping into again soon. It's called Ross. It's a lot like Winners but with real name brands. There may have been some Nike Golf items there..... that should get someone leaving a comment!

Erica and I are baking my Grammie's chocolate chip oatmeal cookies tomorrow. Mmmm I can't wait to eat some of those suckers.

Oh in case you guys don't remember.....I love these guys (look how little Trooper is there)

Thoughts from DC.....

-I'm only 2 1/2 hours from DC! That's like going to Fredericton...

-I saw 12 dead dear on that short drive, even a mama and baby one together :(

-there is something about DC, I feel the same way in Ottawa, hard to explain...not magical, not powerful....maybe a bit powerful....I don't know but something...it was my third time to DC in my life (first time barely remember) and although quick, I still felt it when we went over the bridge that put us in the district and I saw the Washington Monument....hard to explain....those of you that have ever stood in front of the Parliament buildings may be able to understand the feeling I mean

-I felt old being at George Washington University (GWU) and out of style

-had to pay $17.00 for parking and we were only there for 2 and 1/2 hours (yup 17 you read that right...crazy huh?)

-was weird being in the "special collections" section of the library, had to get special clearance to go in there

-weren't allowed to bring in any bags or pens, only pencils so no ink got on anything

-were in a room that had windows facing the desk clerk, we still aren't sure if we were supposed to be quiet or not.....if so we didn't do too good of a job....we were just way too excited

-each box that I went out and brought in (we were only allowed one box at a time and we looked at 8) was a scary mystery if that makes any sense....I am the one that decided which boxes would be picked but they just had numbers on them and I didn't remember which one was what...so I knew the leucotomies (basically ice picks that Freeman designed) were in one and I just never knew which one

-instruments ended up being in the last box, we got excellent video of our reactions and thoughts on them....however I'm not the one with the video camera so I don't have the footage for you I can tell you how I felt though....it was weird, scary, sad, and exciting. I was shaking as I unfolded the warn out leather case that Freeman had opened so many times. I could just picture him putting this small case, that was no longer than a pencil, in his back pocket and walking into the surgery room or hotel room, or where ever. They weren't wrapped up or anything, they were just in there. There were 3 different sets and each were different types or spin offs maybe of the other. We had read in the book that Freeman designed his own style that he wanted and that they were adapted as he changed his technique. It was gross and creepy to be holding something that was inserted into someone's brain, that for the most part severely scared them for life or killed them, but at the same time was really saddening. We were thinking about how this was not long ago. This could have been an aunt, grandparent, or even parent of ours that this could have happened to had they been living in the states and displaying symptoms (sometimes even not displaying symptoms unfortunately) of depression, schizophrenia, severe pain, etc. So so so sad, it makes me get teary just typing this. I have been changed holding those instruments. I can't even explain it because I'm not sure fully how yet. I can't quite comprehend the depth of my soul that it has touched but I do know that it is for the better, I can feel it. The purpose of our class reading this book is to understand just how horrible people with mental illness were, and unfortunately still are in some ways, treated. Today I, at the very least, grasped that at a whole new level. These instruments were sharp, cruel, and had changed people's lives forever in an unjust and inhumane way. For some reason it just doesn't do it justice trying to explain it here as I type.

Week 10...

1. holy crap it's week 10 already
2. only one more midterm
3. realizing that I'm always expecting the negative in a situation can be a tough pill to swallow, however now that I've realized it it makes me laugh when I catch myself doing it yet again....realization is the first step to correction apparently :)
4. I love Greenberry's (coffee shop I go to to focus)
5. I'm all done with my United States of Tara episodes and this makes me sad...new episodes start in January...woo hoo! Did you know that Steven Spielberg and Diablo Cody (writer of Juno) are the producers of the show?
6. got an email on signs that your cat may be grieving, Kitty has them all except one :(
7. Trooper is loving his kennel and has not ate his poop or messed in his new home in over a week which = happy Papa
8. Jason's off to Ottawa, that puts him a lot bit closer to me....only 9 hours instead of 19
9. both of my roommates are sick and that scares me because I don't want it
10. played Cranium
11. got back 2 midterms.... 29/30 on one and 99/100 on the other....OH YA!
12. have to write a big research paper that I've been putting off for far too long
13. had my first Ethics team meeting, this is going to be a lot of work
14. am thankful to have wonderful friends in 2 different countries, I'm a lucky girl!
15. debating whether or not to get the H1N1 shot on Monday...any suggestions?

My Lobotomy....

It's time for a field trip to Washington, DC people!!!!

Those of you who know I hate reading will be proud of me. I have finished yet another book (I think that may be 5 in my lifetime). We had to read this book for Psychopathology:

We are now divided into groups and have to do an hour long presentation on a topic from the book. Our group decided to pick actual lobotomies. Most of us, myself included, had never heard of a lobotomy. I literally was gasping in shock when I was reading about it in the book. I have since thought about it a lot, even had a dream that one of my friends was getting one and I couldn't do anything about it (that was when I stopped reading the book before I went to bed). I really encourage you to watch the below video on lobotomies and the man that started them, Walter Freeman. However, I warn you it is graphic. (if you do watch it I'd love to hear your thoughts, please leave a comment

ANYWAYS all that to say....all of Freeman's archives (tools, correspondence, pictures, etc) are all at George Washington University in DC. I contacted them and we're allowed to go see them. They have way too many boxes of stuff. So they gave us a list of all the available items (minus patient folders because those are confidential and we aren't allowed to see those) and then we told them what boxes to pull. So Monday we're off to DC and will be seeing and possibly holding (I say possibly because it may gross me out) the actual freaking ice picks that Freeman used on his patients! Nuts huh? I'm horribly excited about this if that makes sense. We plan on videoing that moment and can hopefully incorporate it into our presentation. I'll let you know how that was....

This honey is one experience that I wouldn't get if I went to school in Canada, so see, it's worth it :) ha ha ha

Oh if anyone wants to borrow the book some time I now own a copy and can bring it home with me at Christmas. It's Howard Dully's (the author) life story on his experience of having a lobotomy at a young age. It's a remarkable story of resilience, hope, and new beginnings.

****thanks to Mel for telling me how to embed youtube videos!!!

ACA ethics competition....

So you are now reading the blog of one of the 4 members of the ACA (American Counseling Association) Ethics Competition Team. Basically what that means is four of us were chosen by the faculty (through a selection process of people who suggested that they were interested from first and second year students) to represent EMU. ACA puts out a case study and Masters level students from qualifying universities pick it apart and come up with the best way ethically to handle the situation.

This gives me no extra credit, other than it will look awesome on my resume and it's REALLY important to me that I learn as much about ethics as possible. So do I have time for this right now (it has to be submitted on Dec. 13), heck no! However, will this give me more experience than headaches over the next couple of weeks? That's what I'm hoping for!

I'm super excited. I signed up thinking that i wouldn't get chosen for the process if I'm honest. So I didn't tell anyone, not even Jason. When I got the email though saying that I had gotten picked I was pumped and scared too :)

So here's hoping that we place!!!!

On my heart.....

I'm missing this chick a lot right now...love you friend!

Dude we need to work on an updated photo when I'm home again :)

Soooo funny....

For all of you Office fans..... you're welcome!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6k5FHJqFde0&feature=popt00us04

(I tried looking for the link to get a YouTube video in my blog and have still had no success, that's what you get for reading a beginner's blog)

EDIT: I've been hearing the aboce link doesn't work anymore...try this one...

Busy girl...

I'll just apologize ahead of time here....

I have a crazy next couple of weeks coming up. It's starting now with a huge midterm on Wednesday that apparently has me a little stressed with the dream I had last night. I dreamt that I fell asleep while writing the essay part. When I woke up the midterm was done and I had to hand mine in without the essay being completed. The worst part about all of this is that Christian was writing his exam next to me and didn't wake me up. I'm going to have to talk to that boy in case this dream becomes a reality :)

I also have way too many papers, projects and reading assignments to do. Good news is though that it should pass the time until I can come home at Christmas!

I'll post when I can friends.....

Last night....

Good times at the Halloween party last night. The only one in our group that decided to dress up was Christian...he's a Californian :) They wanted me to go as a Canadian....what does that even look like? My roots hoodie?

Below is a group shot that Trevor took so he's missing. The new face you're seeing on the right is Susan, Christian's girlfriend. She is doing her Masters in Public Health in DC. Normally Christian goes there, however she decided to come hang out with all of us for a change.

representing LA....
These seem to be becoming mandatory shots....
Trevor and his new friend....

So this guy with Trev is Scott. Man oh man Scott is a busy guy. He's only 19 and has about three different jobs. He told Trevor and I about them in great detail, they all involve farms in one form or another. He had his hands full with these two city slickers trying to explain everything. Seriously this guy was like a character straight out of King of the Hill. He had the accent, was chewing tobacco, and knew way more about farm animals than I could even understand. Trev and I were trying to stay focused and made sure we didn't make eye contact because we both were going to laugh way too hard. So if you would like to know about milking cows, mixing cow feed, picking up dead turkeys, or fixing manure spreading tractors I may be your woman :) He also randomly told me I was a "good lookin' lady" ha ha ha so funny!

As for Trooper and the trick-or-treaters, well for some reason we didn't get any ?!?!?!?! I normally have 40 or so kids coming to the door. So when I was home we went to Costco and bought 48 cans of pop. Who thinks Jason wanted all that pop for his lunches and decided not to turn the lights on? :)

Happy Halloween everyone.....

Gross? Yes....but creative and cool as well :)

I'm off to Erica's boyfriend's party tonight. We don't have to dress up thankfully, however I think those California dudes that I hang out with are. They've been trying to get me to join, but I don't have good Halloween spirit apparently. I'll try to remember to bring my camera and capture some of the fun. I will say though that I'm going to miss handing out cans of pop to the neighbourhood kids back home. If I was home, Troop would be getting dressed up and answering the door with me. I wonder how confused and crazy he'll be tonight? Have fun dear :)

Week 9 I.....

• got over 100% (there was a bonus question) on my PIFE midterm that I was worried about (only 4 of us did this, oh ya)
• had 2 counseling sessions
• listened to Chris Brown's song "Forever" way too much
• had "Forever" stuck in my head everyday and would pass that gift on to Christian and Erica :)
• missed Jason A LOT
• wished my puppy was here, honey can you and Troop come live in VA?
• went to an EMU intramural football game
• will be attending a Halloween party
• felt the closest I've ever felt to having a panic attack and it was scary
• was faced with a dual relationship dilemma and failed
• had Chipotle again, yum
• watched the movie "Zombieland", although stupid premise it was funny at times
• realized that I have a big spot in my heart for sex offenders and that others don't usually share this view
• learned about cognitive behavioral theory
• Trooper is now in a kennel all day long and he seems to be loving it
• haven't spent too much time alone, thankfully
• have been really tired, but have been feeling good
• heard about practicum for next semester?!?!?! I have to have a minimal of 40 hours (or 40 sessions) of direct one on one contact with clients next semester...ahhhhhhhhh
• booked my plane ticket for Christmas....Dec. 19 I'll be back home, 7 more weeks baby!
• realized that role playing in a client/counselor role with one of your close buddies is difficult
• laughed a lot
• registered for my spring semester courses
• joined the American Counselor Association (ACA)....I feel so grown up :)
• have been missing Him, but am realizing that He's still there
• did another midterm, only one more to go
• have been a busy, busy girl

Love this....

I'm a huge fan of The Office. I can't even begin to explain to you how happy I was to FINALLY see Jim and Pam get married. I might have cried a bit watching that episode, I don't think it helps that Jason is 19 hours away. Anyways, I had no idea that the dance at the end to the Chris Brown song was an actual thing that a couple did at their wedding. I have watched this so many times. I don't know what it is about this song but it makes me smile, get teary, and just lift my spirits when I'm missing that man of mine. I've been listening to it a lot lately. Dec. 19 is a long way away!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4-94JhLEiN0

Mandi or Mel....how do I get the freaking video to be on my blog so that it's not the link? I'm so inexperienced at this!

This moment....

And I'm back to feeling like this again.....

this= stumbling towards what I think is light, but I have so much unwanted confusion, thoughts, and images flooding my mind that it makes me want to sit down, hide my face and block my ears.

I will not though...I will not give up, not now...not after all of this. It's that determination, that hope of knowing that this too shall pass, that keeps me pushing forward.

I love this picture... I imagine my face behind that candle. It's the only thing that makes me want to come out of the darkness because, in the end, I know it will be okay. It illuminates me unlike anything else. I feel the warmth of the glow of unconditional love on my face and I see the truth in it.

Good times....

So last night we went to see David's (one of my buddies from school...he's the guitar player on the far left) band play at a local bar....

I've decided that I need to start bringing my camera to these events because we just have way too much fun taking crazy pictures. Also it will give you guys more insight into my world, basically I need to start being a better blogger...ha ha ha

Here are my 3 favorite buddies..... these guys bring a lot of joy to my life and I'm very thankful for them! You have seen pics of Erica and Christian before, but this is the first time I'm introducing you to Trevor. He and Christian are brothers.
So Christian and Trev have just started doing this snake thing all the time.....don't ask their from LA so they are just weird :) I'm laughing here because I just wasn't expecting it to happen in this pic. The other guy in this picture is Tom, he is also one of my classmates. He and his wife are planning a trip to PEI this summer. So they are going to come and visit me in NB!!! This makes me happy because someone will get a glimpse of my life back home. Oh FYI honey....I haven't told you about that yet!

I love, love , love this girl! How hot are we? :) Oh Mandi, Erica is probably going to get engaged any time now and I'm totally trying to convince her to do the Chris Brown song thing at her wedding!!! I've still got loads of convincing to do, she loved it but doesn't think she'd have the guts to do it.

Left to right: David's wife Shelly, (the rest of these gals are my classmates) Jennifer, me, Ellen, Erica, and Kristee

I'm only posting this because this picture makes me laugh every time I see it. I have no idea what either of us are doing here. I was supposed to be looking at the camera I thought and Trev couldn't shut up long enough to take a picture apparently. Someone was a little intoxicated and it was not me :)

I'm off to the coffee shop to get some work done. Hope everyone is doing well!

Awwwwww.....

How cute is this guy? This is Trooper in his new coat that Erica and I picked out for him. The fur that you're seeing sticking out from around his neck is the fur on the hood of the jacket. It's a very trendy jacket so we couldn't resist. Hopefully it will stop the shivering on those cold days that are up ahead! (Jason we should have took the tags off for the picture)

Week 8 realizations.....

1. chicken is way cheaper down here.... I got 5 boneless skinless chicken breasts for $4.10 yesterday and that's not a sale price
2. telling your spiritual journey to a random group of people can be scary and humbling all at the same time
3. midterms aren't just tests in grad school
4. emailing the prof a suggestion can turn into a good idea and then you'll need to speak on the topic in class the next day...guess who introduced the class to DID? :)
5. loving Mario Party on the Wii
6. been invited to 2 Halloween parties
7. having patience issues with some in my class and my roommate
8. leaves are changing on the mountains and it's beautiful
9. Dulles airport is ridiculously busy and confusing
10. meeting with my advisor opened my eyes to a lot of things
11. a trip home re energized me so much....these next few weeks will be a lot easier because of it
12. I am a very passionate person and I'm learning to embrace that
13. 8 for 8 with crying in Techniques...sheesh
14. will I ever not fight crying?
15. looking forward to counseling tomorrow
16. I have a lot of work to do....editor in chief watch out
17. I have something planned each night for the next four nights all with different people.... YAY for friends!
18. don't let things sit, just address them and you'll feel so much better
19. the worst realization of my week.....the 3 hour midterm is only worth 10% of my mark... COME ON! I'm quite bitter about this midterm aren't I? However this may be the best realization depending on what my mark is :)

WOAH......

Holy crap I am pumped right now.....

So I decided to do some research tonight (you know because I have all of this spare time) to see if there was some specific dissociative identity disorder (DID) training that I could do. There is... so that's exciting....but what's even more exciting is this

This is a show on Showtime called The United States of Tara. It's about a mom (played by Toni Colette....love her) who has DID. Can I just tell you I had the biggest smile on my face watching this show. I was actually able to see what was coming next. It was so cool! I have such a HUGE passion for DID and I just know I'm going to be working with people who have been BLESSED by this wonderful coping mechanism. Anyways, I could go on and on but I need to get ready for tomorrow. I know some of you are going to be interested in seeing this so I'll keep my fingers crossed that you can find a website to watch it on there. I was able to watch the first episode here http://www.sho.com/site/order/preview.do#/US_Tara_s01_e01 hopefully that link will work for you.

AHHHHH I love my heart and the joy these moments bring me. I have tears in my eyes right now and I'm so thankful to be handed this precious gift of getting my Masters in Counselling so that I can attend to others in an authentic, empathetic, trusting way!!!!!

High and low.....

Positive about today: It's freaking 23 here today....I was able to pull out the flip flops yet again... whose jealous?

Negative about today: MY MIDTERM....that's right I said MIDTERM.... WAS FREAKING 3 HOURS LONG! Is that not insane? Arghhhh I'm freaking drained right now. My "A" streak may be over. I'll let you all know when I get it back, yes even if it's not a "A" :)

Although I'm tired I've got more work to do for tomorrow. Normally I just relax on Wed nights. However, spending time with Jason this weekend was important so some things got bumped. Good thing I get to type those assignments though. My poor hand cannot write anymore today!

Thank you all for your well wishes about my midterm..... I was a little stressed!

Quick post....

(man that title makes me think of accounting.....) Sorry I dropped you all on my count down, things got a little hectic towards the end....

I'm a little stressed right now so I don't have a lot of time. I'm just getting back to VA, it's been a long day, and I have a midterm tomorrow that I need to study for. However, I wanted to let you all know that I made it back safe and sound.

I'm so thankful for the weekend. Although it was short and quick I had loads of fun. Thank you all for your blesses and well wishes. Getting to see everyone, going to MY church, laughing, playing games, SEEING JASON, squeezing that cuddly puppy, etc, etc, etc, has given me the strength to go on for another 8 weeks. Hopefully before I know it I'll be doing another daily count down!

Now on to study professional identity, function and ethics..... I think I'm going to need some strong tea for this one......

3 days....

I'm so glad yesterday is over. I haven't cried that much in a long time. Why is it that when one thing happens in your life a million more things hit as well? And how is it that you can have the best of intentions but those are usually received wrong on the other end? Anyways, it's done and I have a session with good old Nate on Wednesday night so I'm all set :)

I'm feeling really stressed right now so I'm going to be mean and not put up a pic. I'm running out of time to get all my school work done. I've been working really hard because I don't want to do a single thing when I'm home this weekend. I'm almost at that place. Plus I have to go out this afternoon and get some final supplies to bring back with me (Deb I've looked every where for those candies and have not found them....maybe at CHristmas time). Someone has put in an order for a coat for Trooper :)

I do however want to post this quote. I'm not usually one for quotes but I love this one. I pretty much love anything and everything to do with counseling right now because that's my life and I'm freaking pumped about it!

"Pay attention, we are listening each other into being!"

4 days....

How come the closer it gets to me going home the harder this is getting? Sheesh I am a mess today! I REALLY need to see this guy soon!

ha ha this was Jason's reaction when he got to the top of the escalator at the PGA Pro Shop in St. Augustine, Florida. Can you believe that we actually left there without buying anything?

5 days....

So I'm getting quite weepy whenever anyone asks me where home is or gives me the whole "oh you poor thing" when they realize my husband is still there. I found last night particularly hard after watching The Office (hooray Pam and Jim FINALLY got married...it was so good). Then today with Thanksgiving, this is the first time that I haven't been with my family for that. I don't know, it was just weird.

However thankfully I have some people here who I am super thankful for. Thinking of these 4 main people right now just makes my heart fill up with joy (well actually there are 5 but I do not have a picture of Trevor...I'll have to work on that). Without them I don't know where I'd be.

(Christian and Erica)

(Kurt---the Canadian---Nathan, Eli and April)

Since I've focused on Erica and Christian before let's talk about April and Kurt. I've only known these guys for 4 weeks now but I have been at there house every week for those 4 weeks. Being at their house reminds me of when I'm at Mandi and Greg's (except I haven't hit the upstairs bathroom yet...ha ha ha). I feel so comfortable there. April and I cook and chat. The kids are wonderful. Nathan is special needs and melts my heart and Eli. Ha ha ha oh Eli. She is a diva with a capital D. I love it. She so reminds me of Katie when she was younger. Oh and another favorite thing at their house for me is this guy....

Miles greets me in the driveway every time I come. I love him and he loves me. I snuck him some turkey tonight so we'll be best buds forever :) He has one fang that's longer than the other and hangs out of his mouth. It's really cute but you've got to watch it when you're petting him. He gets so into it and starts rubbing his head all over you not realizing that the freaky fang can slice you open.

The other nuts thing is that Kurt and Jason are wayyyyyy too much alike. Since Kurt has been married longer he has all the things that Jason is still begging me for. Like a truck for example. Kurt just got a brand new truck and it just happens to be the same one Jason wants. I told Kurt this the first time I went over. So EVERY time I go over now guess who has a new reason for why I should let Jason get a truck? Yup you got it Mr. Kurt. It's like having a piece of Jason right here in VA :) Today we need a truck so that we can haul folding tables and chairs from the church for our big Thanksgiving get together. I told him that 1. I would never have that many people to my house for a meal and 2. I don't go to a church that has folding tables and chairs that I would need to put in a truck. Doesn't matter though, he'll have something else for the next time I go over.

Anyways, although I wasn't home for Thanksgiving it was a blast. I'm tired and stuffed to the max but it was so worth it. The warmth and love I felt tonight helped me make it through another day in this sometimes difficult, lonely journey. I'm so thankful to them for blessing me with their home and love. I went to their church for the first time today as well and it was the first time since I've been here that I really connected with God in a church environment. I have soooo missed that. So needless to say I'll be back. Anyways here are a couple more pics from tonight....

Lastly Eli wanted me to put this on my blog because "this is the sign for I love you". I showed her what I thought it was but she said "no this is it, I know sign language" :) So there you go folks, a little lesson from a very smart 5 year old!